Is there a difference between a pigeon and a dove?

Gary Noth

One of the benefits of winter weather is that all the pigeons leave town. Along with the yellowjackets. Yay! Each spring, I have a pigeon that returns and sits atop the pole outside my house.

This past year, he brought friends. My sidewalk was white with pigeon doo-doo. The worst part was the nonstop coo coo coo. I was told that it was not legal to toss a hand grenade at the pigeon to chase him off.

Some years back my neighbor had started to feed all the poor birdies. How she knew they were poor, I have zero idea, but instead of one pigeon and occasionally two, there were now 13. Fortunately, she moved, and the pigeons moved on when the free food ran out. Except my one yearly visitor.

Over coffee one day, a friend of mine said, “They are not pigeons, they are doves.” Ugh! I’m trying to wake up, just enjoy the morning and drink my coffee and I couldn’t believe he said that. I fired up the computer and typed in “What are the differences (between the two)?” I just wanted to enjoy my coffee.

That Wiki place answered: A dove lives out in the countryside, and a pigeon lives in town. There are no differences except where they live. He still disagreed and then started on climate changes. He was of the opinion that climate change was because of diesel trucks, like mine, but not because of his hybrid. 

I started to show him where his battery was dug up but gave up. I told him that everyone knows that it is a proven fact that climate change is caused by the air in the potato chip bags. Until they start to fill the potato chip bags back to the top, climate change will continue to happen. 

Needless to say, we no longer have coffee in the morning.